Intentional parenting in this season of life can be tough. It's not like when they were little - there's no real play book.
But parenting with a clear intention can also create a stronger bond between you and your child. And your child needs that more than ever as she reaches her tween and teen years.
This season is like a big steaming bowl of hot and sour soup when it's cold out. The school years are filled with experiences that startle me with their sweetness - a long overdue snuggle request, a glance stolen from another room of my older son helping my younger son with homework, or a moment overhearing him stand up for a friend. Any one of these scenes warms me down to my frozen toes. They did hear what I've been saying for ten years!
Then there's the sour. This sour stings like never before. It's the time of their lives when our kids speak in code.
They need connection even when they are picking fights with us, seeming self-centered, or rejecting anything parental. It's their turn to scream "We're Not Gonna Take It!" And it's our turn to receive the message.
This season of intentional parenting doesn't go down easy like your morning latte.
The time of giving kids information and guidance is transitioning into a season of listening and making space for them to make their own choices. And to be there holding space for them when they fail. Bigly.
It's frightening enough to keep you up at night. Remember your first trip to the beach after seeing JAWS? Yeah. Just like that.
But, Monty, what's behind curtain number two?
Friends, that's where the really good stuff is. This is where all of your efforts at intentional parenting pay off. No matter when you started or are going to start your intentional parenting journey - it's never too late!
These moments feel like manning a rocket - you'll experience brief, but oh so intense, moments when you explode with awe at who your child is becoming. And then there is a floating feeling of relief - the kids are gonna' be ok.
This shift in your relationship is leading to something way better than the first time you partied like it was 1999, laid your eyes on Johnny Depp, or heard NKOTB...
If you'd love to learn specific actionable words & phrases to help you be a more intentional parent, I’ve created a FREE email series just for you!
As intentional parents, we believe that the one thing that children want and need more than anything else is our time and our attention. And we believe that we can best provide that by being present and intentional in our interactions with them.
If this is something you believe and want in your life too, then join me!
In this free series, I'll share with you some of my favorite, super actionable, words, phrases, and strategies for intentionally parenting through tough situations like:
- mom burn out;
- boredom (theirs...not yours);
- reinforcing a strong sense of worth; and
- nurturing curiosity in many ways.
CLICK the image if you're ready to start today!
Mothering tweens and teens feels like the home stretch of a race when you're alone: everyone is watching, some blabby Betties are judging, and you've never wanted anything as bad as you want to cross that finish line!
And you are all alone.
When you first brought your tiny, vanilla-scented, bundle of chubs home, you navigated all that newness by finding and creating meaningful, vulnerable, and supportive connections with others in our same season of life.
We weren't alone. We built our tribe.
Personally, my mom group was our own "Private Benjamin" version of the Marines...no mom gets left behind! No toddler gets left unattended! Semper fi was our playground battle cry!!
So there was that, until there wasn't.
But the paralyzing uncertainty came back in the years of tweens and teens.
These years re-visit the newness of the toddler years: the kids grunt only in single syllables; scarf shocking amounts of groceries; and want to stay glued to a video game.
On the flip-side, they can also slay with the latest joke, help with a project around the house, or ask to "do lunch" together. But you never know which version of your kid is coming through the door. As the saying goes: On guard!
Decisions now feel more long-lasting. More impactful.
And there's this: as the kids got older, your mom group went in a thousand different directions - soccer, coding, drama, hip-hop, piano, football, band, tutors, chess club, dance... We're slogging through this new wilderness without the same compass of our protective mom group from years past.
Are they ready to fly? Are we ready to set them free?
That's what I'm doing here at The Midlife Mamas. I help women with school-aged children navigate the overwhelming changes taking place in their lives. Together, we wrestle parenting challenges to the ground, maximize our health, nourish our spirits, and work to leave a better world behind for the generations that follow.
Here I hope that you will find that connection you've missed during this uncharted new season of motherhood.
This season of motherhood is every bit as fun, frustrating, and awe-inspiring as your baby's first steps, words, and soccer game. I promise. You just need to join the girls who have your back.
We are here! We are here!
When You Have A Moment To Think Actual Thoughts - Click One Of The Images Below To Read More About What You Want For YOURSELF!
Remember hearing "You've got Mail!" from AOL? I still love seeing that I have mail.
And my favorite mail is from YOU! (not even kidding...)
If you CLICK on the envelope icon, you can let me know what are you celebrating and what sucks. Because I bet it isn't only you. Let me know and I'll write it for you!